FDP Forum / Competitve attitude in new singer? Or am I just a jerk?/ 14 messages in thread.

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bassboysinger



USA/Michigan

Yes, I use all 6 strings on my bass!
Mar 21st, 2012 07:56 AM        

Ok, I have been fronting our group for a few months, singing lead and playing bass (oh, I'm a dude). SO we get a new female singer. Her FIRST day she starts this thing of we get done with a song and she will say to me something like, "Gee, having a little trouble with that one." Wasn't having any problem - I think her prob is I am a high tenor, she's an alto and when I go to falsetto I totally leave her in the dust(like on Dust in the Wind, Kansas). SO, we get done with Collective SOul's "Shine" during her SECOND dayn and she is like, "do you HAVE to sing that falsetto?" I had enough and told her I was dead on pitch, it frankly sounded great, and that it was rude as all to roll it out like that, and that I HAD kept my mouth shut when she was making those howling noises from her side of the room. Dead silence,awkward. Was I out of line?



jbryan



Minneapolis

Mar 21st, 2012 10:23 AM        

Well, this is will certainly be the start of band drama! She does sound pretty full of herself. But, was she hired to be the lead vocalist? Is she well known in your area? Lots of things to factor in. If she's an unknown and not as experienced, then she is def out of line. <br /> <br /> I know our lead female singer is super well-known, been in a lot of local bands, and is a great singer, so we all listen to what she suggests. She has a much better, more tactful delivery though than yours new singer from what you described!



bassboysinger



USA/Michigan

Yes, I use all 6 strings on my bass!
Mar 21st, 2012 10:55 AM        

No, she was absolutely not hired as lead vocalist, in fact, it was explained to her that the current song line-up is probably 60-70% strictly guy tunes - like the lyrics reference the singer is a man.<br /> Unknown - she's sang in church. Knows nothing about music, like even the dif. between a verse and a chorus(seriously). She's had 14 tunes on a CD and Word docs of the lyrics for 2 weeks - spent a LOT of time coming over and digging through my cheat-sheets. Ironically, 10 minutes before she showed up (1/2 hour late), I was the one defending her, saying she might just be trying to find her place in the mix - our rythmn player was adamant that she wasn't what we needed. And obviously she owns not a single piece pf equip, not even a mic or a music stand. She didn't like the new Shure 86s I had bought for the whole group a month ago, " these are weird, don't you have any with the round ball shape?" I think the other guys were thinking she would be eye candy...I ain't seeing that either, but my vision may be tainted at this point. My other problem - even when it is stressed that, "this is a song for a soloist" she still joins in. You know, he first-person songs that frequently start with "I" or "me". I'd really love to share singing duties....I don't need the ego-boost, been there, done that (road dog). If someone really good showed up I could just chill on the bass, no big deal. I suppose she'll bring her old man next practice - sure hope we don't have a throw down over his old lady.



BrentD

Contributing Member
****

Lansing, MI

Mar 21st, 2012 11:00 AM        

Where in MI are you (city-wise)? Just curious.



bassboysinger



USA/Michigan

Yes, I use all 6 strings on my bass!
Mar 21st, 2012 11:05 AM        

Milford - feel free to contact me, details in profile.



scott-s

Contributing Member
***

juneau ak.

Stole every lick I know
Apr 5th, 2013 08:31 PM        

Am I just a Jerk? Well, here's what I got going on in my own little drama scene. Me and another guy play at open mics sometimes-just because it gives us something to work for, He is a smoking hot Harp player but ALWAYS sings a little off,and I'll suggest that we try a sight key change because<br /> he sounds flat, but no mater what, he'll sing flat and is getting sensitive about my suggestions. So last time out I just picked one song he sings ( I call the songs because of the drum machine set-up) but he wasn't happy at all with that! The thing is, I like playing with him because of his playing, not because of his singing....I feel like a jerk! This is probably going to be the end of it! <br /> <br />



fendrguitplayr

Contributing Member
********

Greater Boston

Where suspense is never in short supply.
Apr 5th, 2013 09:02 PM        

Replace her if the others agree. In my experiences, most female singers have this "diva thing" kinda built in - but not all - see what the others say and feel and then decide.



greg1948

Contributing Member
***

Basking Ridge, NJ,

Apr 7th, 2013 06:27 AM        

I'd record the sessions with her. Let the playback determine who is and is not on pitch. And, more important, whether there's a blend of the voices.



gmanNJ



Joisey

Official Brew Master of Clamfest
Apr 8th, 2013 10:32 AM        

Tape dont lie!<br /> <br /> this way feelings dont get hurt because its not so subjective. You can also do the songs with and with out her and then compare



scott-s

Contributing Member
***

juneau ak.

Stole every lick I know
Apr 8th, 2013 11:50 AM        

What ever you do try to resolve it quick because it seems to screw with the band mojo. I agree with the last poster, tape don't lie, but sometimes people hear what they want to hear. What may sound perfectly fine to one person don't cut it with the next guy, unless of coures it's painfully obvious. Still, it's a good starting point. Good luck, hope it turns out well.



themaestro

Contributing Member
**********
**

Wichita, Kansas

Drums = pulse, Bass = heartbeat
Apr 24th, 2013 07:02 AM        

Unknown singer, with no musical training or experience (can't tell verse from chorus)? She would have to a killer voice and stage presence for me to put up with her.<br /> <br /> I was in one band backing a girl that really knew her stuff. Exceptional singer, piano training. Could discuss things with her in musical terms. Could count. Knew when to come in, even if the intro got flubbed. Had her own wireless mic. She helped carry small stuff in, but usually didn't set up. However, she would usually spend some of that time schmoosing up with venue owners and customers. What a pleasure to work with.



AlanSDeux



California

AlanSDeux
Jul 18th, 2013 05:10 PM        

How did the 'getting' of this singer go down? Was it a band decision, i.e., something you had a vote in? But even without knowing that, I think it would be good for you and the girl to sit down and talk. The more honest the two of you can be with one another, and the more respectful of one another's feelings in your exchange, the quicker this problem will resolve.<br /> <br /> As for being a jerk...no one can answer that...but you. Good luck with it.<br /> <br /> Alan<br /> <br /> <br />



tdk



Finland

HELP! Population less than 100 000 000!
Apr 6th, 2015 02:09 PM        

Sorry for me saying this but maybe she was right. Not saying she or I could do any better but the point is, its not a question of how well you sing. Its just something you dont do. You dont critisize. Not even if you are asked for an opinion. Be constructive. Come with suggestions. And not if your new in the band. Dump her.<br /> <br /> Conspiracy theory: maybe some one in the band wants you out and its come to this... no better man for the job than a woman ;)



shunka



Willoughby, OH , USA

I'm arrogant and a moron
Apr 7th, 2015 12:11 PM        

Amazes me how many singers don't have a clue regarding music theory, terminology etc. Don't even know what key they sing particular songs in. How hard is it to figure out a C Major scale on the piano, all the white keys? Can't count! I know a few musicians like that also, but at least with them you can look at what notes they're playing.<br /> Communication is always a problem with these folks.<br /> I've reached the point where I dislike working with a singer who doesn't play something, at least well enough to pick out a note here and there.<br /> As far as criticism - there is such a thing as tact. Tone of voice when you make a statement can convey so much. There is a big diff between a sincere, "are you having a problem with that part? Perhaps we should switch?" or a snide "Having a problem with that part?"



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