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FDP Forum / Moe's Tavern (_8^(I) / Movie stuff that's fake

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reverendrob
FDP Data Goon
Moderator

We all want

our time in hell
Oct 3rd, 2017 04:03 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

There's a few hybrids out there was well - flip the gas regulator on a FNFAL to "Grenade" shuts off the port to the bolt, making it a straight pull bolt gun until switched back.

It was nearly as quiet with my Gemtech HVT as the Rem 700 I tried it on.

Gato
Contributing Member
**********
*****

Southern Calif

Oct 3rd, 2017 06:55 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

Sci Fi:
Breathable atmosphere on asteroids
Space ships with "anti-gravity" switch

Cop Movies:
Cop guns down three robbery suspects and is back on the street before the smell of cordite dissipates.

Anti-hero homicide detective who constantly violates policy and tells his supervisors to f**k off, yet somehow keeps his job.

Same detective uses his personal super charged vehicle on duty, routinely drives 90 mph on city streets, never stops for a red light, yet never gets pulled over.

Westerns:

The hero fans his six shooter and delivers perfect bulls eye hits on the several bad guys confronting him simultaneously. Their shots always miss.

Horror:

Female victim is always equipped with a flashlight that must be continually slapped in order to function. Until it quits.

Female victim flees monster/slasher on foot, and inevitably falls down.

Is there any dark, foreboding basement they won't go into for no reason at all?

Why does that vehicle with 6 randy college students always break down within a hundred yards of the house of horrors?

Why is there always at least one idiot in the college group who insists on pissing off the gap toothed cannibal running the Last Chance gas station?





Gene from Tampa
Contributing Member
*******

Tampa, FL

Live! From God's Waiting Room ....
Oct 3rd, 2017 08:03 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

Captain Kirk with a full head of hair.



littleuch
Contributing Member
**********
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Florida

Oct 3rd, 2017 08:05 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

I was flipping through the channels the other day and a rerun of Blue Bloods was on. Danny was listening to a 911 call and was trying to discern some background chatter. "Wait! Isolate that!". A quick playback and clear as day an MTA announcement for a departing training, no other trace of the caller's voice.

I snorked.

Peegoo
Contributing Member
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******

Deus

ex Machina
Oct 3rd, 2017 08:08 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

To add to Gato's horror film list:

1. If there's ever a homicidal lunatic terrorizing your lakeside campground, do NOT take a shower.

2. Properly maintain your vehicle. You need it to start right up when that homicidal lunatic is standing on your hood with an axe in his grubby fists.

littleuch
Contributing Member
**********
*****

Florida

Oct 3rd, 2017 08:13 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

People hanging the phone up without saying goodbye.

The roll off and business as usual 1 second after sex.

Mandatory feedback stepping up to the podium.

Smart kids.



mroulier
Contributing Member
**********

Suburban MD.

Are your prayer beads maple or rosewood?
Oct 3rd, 2017 08:56 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

"Why does that vehicle with 6 randy college students always break down within a hundred yards of the house of horrors?

Why is there always at least one idiot in the college group who insists on pissing off the gap toothed cannibal running the Last Chance gas station?"

I highly recommend "Cabin in the Woods" to see ALL the horror movie tropes shown, and then flipped on their head!

mfitz804
Contributing Member
**********
*********

Staten Island, NY

Godzilla the Thread Killa
Oct 3rd, 2017 08:59 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

"Cop Movies:
Cop guns down three robbery suspects and is back on the street before the smell of cordite dissipates."

How about the battles with like 300 shots fired, and not a single person gets hit?

Also, almost every actress's boobs.

"Getting knocked out with a blow to the head, coming round and carrying on like nothing happened."

Also, how easy it is to knock someone out with a blow to the head. Sometimes you don't even need a weapon and you can just do it with a fist! The guy will do it and not even be ready for a fight, because he is 100% confident he just landed a knockout blow.

I'll also throw in there, how easy it is to kill a guy by snapping his neck. I have never tried it, but I suspect its not as easily done as in the movies, where you barely even have to touch the guy.

Also, girls getting horny for the pizza guy, though admittedly those are a different type of movie.

(This message was last edited by mfitz804 at 11:00 AM, Oct 3rd, 2017)

Guitar Fool
Contributing Member
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Sunshine State

Just a pawn in someone else's game
Oct 3rd, 2017 09:14 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

the one I hate the most..

Bad guys with Uzi's spray the room with 600 bullets but can't hit the good guy with a pistol...and of course the good guy always finds a way to win.




tepperson

Look at my hair ...

... LIKE THE DESIGN?!
Oct 3rd, 2017 09:32 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

Squealing your tires on gravel ...

reverend mikey
Contributing Member
**********
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N of I-90, E of I-29

You're old. Then vintage. Then good!
Oct 3rd, 2017 10:01 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

The ability to hack into any computer system or security system just in the nick of time... all by people are just aren't geeky enough or nerdy enough to really be able to do it.

Peegoo
Contributing Member
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Deus

ex Machina
Oct 3rd, 2017 10:12 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

The music. I really wish I could hear the low rumble of cellos whenever something bad or dramatic is about to happen to me.

Person gets shot once and falls down. That is almost never the case. In an actual situation, they keep coming at you unless you get a lucky hit on something really important.

Lighting. In every movie.

Rain. In every movie where there's rain. The giveaway is it's raining there in the scene, but out behind them, things are clearly visible off in the distance.

archiestone
Contributing Member
**********
*

El Californio

Oct 3rd, 2017 11:29 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

Sean Connery's Scottish accent: fake.
He's actually from Cleveland.

vomer
Contributing Member
**********

Broke Down

in the Brassicas
Oct 3rd, 2017 11:42 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

"GET OUT!!!!"

"Hey guys, let's go see what's upstairs."

Electron

Undiscover'd country

from whose bourn no traveller returns.
Oct 3rd, 2017 11:42 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

Sound waves travelling the speed of light. Ex:
Submarine torpedoes a freighter. In the distance, we see and hear the blast simultaneously. No movie gets this right.

mfitz804
Contributing Member
**********
*********

Staten Island, NY

Godzilla the Thread Killa
Oct 3rd, 2017 11:44 AM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

"Hey guys, let's go see what's upstairs."

Or, t that end, "We should split up!"

wborys
OldFartBassPlayerWalt

Robbinsville, NJ

what do you mean the bass is too loud?
Oct 3rd, 2017 12:25 PM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

"Can you magnify that low resolution security cam image capture of a license plate 300 yards away, so we can read the numbers?"

"Sure, no problem, just a few mouse clicks and
we got it.."

MJB
Contributing Member
**********
**

Who's we sucka?

Smith, Wesson and me.
Oct 3rd, 2017 01:07 PM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

Young hot chicks swooning over old geezers like us.

Gato
Contributing Member
**********
*****

Southern Calif

Oct 3rd, 2017 02:31 PM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

Crazy terrorist always helps out the good guys defusing the bomb, by using a red wire for the essential trigger circuit.

Crazy terrorist always puts a bright LED countdown clock nestled withing the explosives. Why? He's not going to be anywhere near it when it goes off.

Has anyone in any movie anywhere ever been hit by a ricochet or bullet fragment when someone shoots a padlock off a gate, door, treasure chest, etc?

Any car, no matter how exotic or modern is stolen in a heartbeat by both good guys and bad guys, by causing sparks between two wires that just randomly tumble out from beneath the dashboard.
(and how does starting the engine that way defeat the steering wheel lock, exactly?)

WireDog
Contributing Member
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***

Sunken Heights

North Carolina
Oct 3rd, 2017 02:33 PM   Edit   Profile   Print Topic   Search Topic

Not getting the ammo off the dead guys during a gunfight.


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FDP Forum / Moe's Tavern (_8^(I) / Movie stuff that's fake




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