FDP Home Page / FDP Forum / FAQ's

The FDP is made possible by the following companies and individual members like you.
Please use the links below to show them we value their sponsorship.

Apex Tube Matching

WD Music

Jensen Loudspeakers

Yellowjackets Tube Converters


Antique Electronics Supply


Amplified Parts

* God bless America and our men and women in uniform *

* Illegitimi non carborundum! *

If you benefit and learn from the FDP and enjoy our site, please help support us and become a Contributing Member or make a Donation today! The FDP counts on YOU to help keep the site going with an annual contribution. It's quick and easy with PayPal. Please do it TODAY!

Chris Greene, Host & Founder



Find musicians
in your area!
  Search the Forums  

FDP Forum / Sing, Sing, Sing! - Vocalist's Forum / Competitve attitude in new singer? Or am I just a jerk?



Yes, I use all 6 strings on my bass!
Mar 21st, 2012 07:56 AM   Edit   Profile  

Ok, I have been fronting our group for a few months, singing lead and playing bass (oh, I'm a dude). SO we get a new female singer. Her FIRST day she starts this thing of we get done with a song and she will say to me something like, "Gee, having a little trouble with that one." Wasn't having any problem - I think her prob is I am a high tenor, she's an alto and when I go to falsetto I totally leave her in the dust(like on Dust in the Wind, Kansas). SO, we get done with Collective SOul's "Shine" during her SECOND dayn and she is like, "do you HAVE to sing that falsetto?" I had enough and told her I was dead on pitch, it frankly sounded great, and that it was rude as all to roll it out like that, and that I HAD kept my mouth shut when she was making those howling noises from her side of the room. Dead silence,awkward. Was I out of line?



Mar 21st, 2012 10:23 AM   Edit   Profile  

Well, this is will certainly be the start of band drama! She does sound pretty full of herself. But, was she hired to be the lead vocalist? Is she well known in your area? Lots of things to factor in. If she's an unknown and not as experienced, then she is def out of line.

I know our lead female singer is super well-known, been in a lot of local bands, and is a great singer, so we all listen to what she suggests. She has a much better, more tactful delivery though than yours new singer from what you described!



Yes, I use all 6 strings on my bass!
Mar 21st, 2012 10:55 AM   Edit   Profile  

No, she was absolutely not hired as lead vocalist, in fact, it was explained to her that the current song line-up is probably 60-70% strictly guy tunes - like the lyrics reference the singer is a man.
Unknown - she's sang in church. Knows nothing about music, like even the dif. between a verse and a chorus(seriously). She's had 14 tunes on a CD and Word docs of the lyrics for 2 weeks - spent a LOT of time coming over and digging through my cheat-sheets. Ironically, 10 minutes before she showed up (1/2 hour late), I was the one defending her, saying she might just be trying to find her place in the mix - our rythmn player was adamant that she wasn't what we needed. And obviously she owns not a single piece pf equip, not even a mic or a music stand. She didn't like the new Shure 86s I had bought for the whole group a month ago, " these are weird, don't you have any with the round ball shape?" I think the other guys were thinking she would be eye candy...I ain't seeing that either, but my vision may be tainted at this point. My other problem - even when it is stressed that, "this is a song for a soloist" she still joins in. You know, he first-person songs that frequently start with "I" or "me". I'd really love to share singing duties....I don't need the ego-boost, been there, done that (road dog). If someone really good showed up I could just chill on the bass, no big deal. I suppose she'll bring her old man next practice - sure hope we don't have a throw down over his old lady.

(This message was last edited by bassboysinger at 10:58 AM, Mar 21st, 2012)

Contributing Member

Lansing, MI

Mar 21st, 2012 11:00 AM   Edit   Profile  

Where in MI are you (city-wise)? Just curious.



Yes, I use all 6 strings on my bass!
Mar 21st, 2012 11:05 AM   Edit   Profile  

Milford - feel free to contact me, details in profile.

(This message was last edited by bassboysinger at 11:25 AM, Mar 21st, 2012)

Contributing Member

juneau ak.

Stole every lick I know
Apr 5th, 2013 08:31 PM   Edit   Profile  

Am I just a Jerk? Well, here's what I got going on in my own little drama scene. Me and another guy play at open mics sometimes-just because it gives us something to work for, He is a smoking hot Harp player but ALWAYS sings a little off,and I'll suggest that we try a sight key change because
he sounds flat, but no mater what, he'll sing flat and is getting sensitive about my suggestions. So last time out I just picked one song he sings ( I call the songs because of the drum machine set-up) but he wasn't happy at all with that! The thing is, I like playing with him because of his playing, not because of his singing....I feel like a jerk! This is probably going to be the end of it!

Contributing Member

Greater Boston

Where suspense is never in short supply.
Apr 5th, 2013 09:02 PM   Edit   Profile  

Replace her if the others agree. In my experiences, most female singers have this "diva thing" kinda built in - but not all - see what the others say and feel and then decide.

Contributing Member

Basking Ridge, NJ,

Apr 7th, 2013 06:27 AM   Edit   Profile  

I'd record the sessions with her. Let the playback determine who is and is not on pitch. And, more important, whether there's a blend of the voices.



Official Brew Master of Clamfest
Apr 8th, 2013 10:32 AM   Edit   Profile  

Tape dont lie!

this way feelings dont get hurt because its not so subjective. You can also do the songs with and with out her and then compare

Contributing Member

juneau ak.

Stole every lick I know
Apr 8th, 2013 11:50 AM   Edit   Profile  

What ever you do try to resolve it quick because it seems to screw with the band mojo. I agree with the last poster, tape don't lie, but sometimes people hear what they want to hear. What may sound perfectly fine to one person don't cut it with the next guy, unless of coures it's painfully obvious. Still, it's a good starting point. Good luck, hope it turns out well.

Contributing Member

Wichita, Kansas

Drums = pulse, Bass = heartbeat
Apr 24th, 2013 07:02 AM   Edit   Profile  

Unknown singer, with no musical training or experience (can't tell verse from chorus)? She would have to a killer voice and stage presence for me to put up with her.

I was in one band backing a girl that really knew her stuff. Exceptional singer, piano training. Could discuss things with her in musical terms. Could count. Knew when to come in, even if the intro got flubbed. Had her own wireless mic. She helped carry small stuff in, but usually didn't set up. However, she would usually spend some of that time schmoosing up with venue owners and customers. What a pleasure to work with.



Jul 18th, 2013 05:10 PM   Edit   Profile  

How did the 'getting' of this singer go down? Was it a band decision, i.e., something you had a vote in? But even without knowing that, I think it would be good for you and the girl to sit down and talk. The more honest the two of you can be with one another, and the more respectful of one another's feelings in your exchange, the quicker this problem will resolve.

As for being a jerk...no one can answer that...but you. Good luck with it.




HELP! Population less than 100 000 000!
Apr 6th, 2015 02:09 PM   Edit   Profile  

Sorry for me saying this but maybe she was right. Not saying she or I could do any better but the point is, its not a question of how well you sing. Its just something you dont do. You dont critisize. Not even if you are asked for an opinion. Be constructive. Come with suggestions. And not if your new in the band. Dump her.

Conspiracy theory: maybe some one in the band wants you out and its come to this... no better man for the job than a woman ;)


Willoughby, OH , USA

I'm arrogant and a moron
Apr 7th, 2015 12:11 PM   Edit   Profile  

Amazes me how many singers don't have a clue regarding music theory, terminology etc. Don't even know what key they sing particular songs in. How hard is it to figure out a C Major scale on the piano, all the white keys? Can't count! I know a few musicians like that also, but at least with them you can look at what notes they're playing.
Communication is always a problem with these folks.
I've reached the point where I dislike working with a singer who doesn't play something, at least well enough to pick out a note here and there.
As far as criticism - there is such a thing as tact. Tone of voice when you make a statement can convey so much. There is a big diff between a sincere, "are you having a problem with that part? Perhaps we should switch?" or a snide "Having a problem with that part?"

(This message was last edited by shunka at 02:12 PM, Apr 7th, 2015)

FDP Forum / Sing, Sing, Sing! - Vocalist's Forum / Competitve attitude in new singer? Or am I just a jerk?

Reply to this Topic
Display my email address             Lost your password?
Your Message:
Link Address (URL):
Link Title:

Moderators: Chris Greene  Iron Man  reverendrob  

FDP, LLC Privacy Policy: Your real name, username, and email
are held in confidence and not disclosed to any third parties, sold, or
used for anything other than FDP Forum registration unless you specifically authorize disclosure.

Internet Application Development

Copyright © 1999-2019 Fender Discussion Page, LLC   All Rights Reserved